Damian & Katerina = [vil-helm] #79

Villlhelllm: How do You even Spell It?

Tiny Tales from Alyce's Weekly Wonders

O.M.G! This week has been a whirlwind of craziness and excitement! Let me share a big secret with you all. For the past 8 months, I’ve had an NG tube to help me feed, but guess what? This week, the NG tube is gone! I can now enjoy the freedom of having both my nostrils back and breathe properly again. It’s been quite an adventure, and I’m so excited to tell you all about it!

First, my surgery was supposed to happen the week before. My parents and I arrived at the hospital all ready to go. I had my gown on and my favorite toys with me. But just when we were all set, the doctor came in and told us the x-ray machine was broken. Can you believe it? We had to go back home and wait for the surgery to be rescheduled.

This week, everything went smoothly. Everyone at the hospital was so friendly and nice. My g-tube surgery took only 45 minutes! It was so quick. After the surgery, I stayed at the hospital with my mom for 24 hours. Then, my dad came to visit, and it felt like he was a superhero coming to save the day! I got to go home, and it was the best feeling ever.

I have to admit, even though the wound is a bit painful and I need some Tylenol to feel better, I feel so free! I’m so happy to show off my new face. It’s so nice to be me again without the NG tube.

This week has been full of ups and downs, but I’m thrilled to have come out on the other side feeling so much better. I can’t wait for more adventures and fun times ahead.

With lots of baby giggles and hugs,

Alyce 💕

PS: I have a new tooth coming in!

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A New Chapter with the G-Tube: A Mother’s Journey

As a parent, the thought of your child undergoing surgery is always accompanied by fear and anxiety. The prospect of Alyce needing a g-tube was daunting, but now that it’s been done and she’s back home, I feel an immense sense of relief. For the first time in months, her nose is free of the NG tube, and we can finally take a deep breath.

The past eight months have been incredibly stressful. The NG tube, essential as it was, brought constant worry. There were so many times when Alyce would pull it out, or it would slip out on its own. Each time this happened, it meant an immediate trip to the ER. The wait times at the hospital varied from one to five hours, and I had to continually advocate for the correct size tube to be placed. By the time we returned home, we were exhausted, physically and emotionally.

Monitoring Alyce became a 24-hour job, just to make sure the tube didn’t come out. The constant vigilance took a toll on us all, but it was especially hard on Alyce, who had to endure the discomfort and the repeated trips to the hospital.

This experience has been a profound lesson in patience for me. I thought I knew what patience was, but the NG tube taught me even more. It was a completely new territory—I had never heard of it before it was placed in Alyce’s nose. It’s astonishing that no prenatal class ever mentioned it. These are real-life challenges that many parents face, yet no resources talk about them during pregnancy.

The NG tube marked a very stressful period in our lives. It was a daily struggle, filled with anxiety and exhaustion. Now, with the g-tube, even though it brings its own set of challenges, it feels like a burden has been lifted. We can now look forward to more peaceful and stable days ahead.

Alyce is stronger than ever, and so are we. This journey has been tough, but it’s also shown us the depth of our resilience and the power of love. We’re stepping into a new chapter with hope and gratitude, ready to face whatever comes our way, together.

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Breaking the Mold: Challenging Parenting Double Standards

Hello Vilhelmians!

As I reflect on my parenting journey, I realize I've often waited for Kat to ask for help instead of jumping in when needed. Let’s be honest: sometimes, men—including me—can be a bit clueless about what needs to be done around the house or with the kids. Hey, dumbass, yes, you need to do more! It’s not that we don’t want to help; we just might not realize how much is on a mom’s plate.

This is where communication becomes crucial. Mothers shouldn’t hesitate to ask for help when they need it. It’s okay to say, “Hey, I could really use your support with this!” We've learned that being direct about our needs can make a world of difference. Trust me, a simple nudge in the right direction can save us from wandering around like lost puppies!

A recent study by the Pew Research Center found that mothers, on average, spend more time on childcare and household tasks than fathers do, even when both parents work full-time. This highlights how ingrained these double standards can be and underscores the need for change. It's frustrating to see how society often praises dads for simply showing up, while mothers are expected to juggle it all without a second thought.

Recognizing this imbalance, I've started taking ownership of specific tasks. For instance, I've implemented habit stacking by taking Alyce for walks while also walking the dogs. This allows me to contribute more while also spending quality time with our daughter. However, I've come to realize that some parenting responsibilities require more expertise than others. I still lean on Kat's knowledge for bedtime routines with the “toddler” and medical appointments, which demand a level of organization, experience, and patience that I'm still developing. In fact, making medical appointments can feel like solving a Rubik's Cube—just when you think you've got it figured out, you realize you've only made it worse!

By changing my mindset and actively looking for ways to help Kat and spend time with Alyce, I’m not only lightening Kat's load but also creating meaningful moments. Let’s face it, if I can manage four hours alone with Alyce without calling in for reinforcement, that’s a win! I mean, who knew watching Gabby's Dollhouse could be so intense? It’s like a masterclass in cat-themed problem-solving! Bonding with Alyce is a new experience, like trying to assemble IKEA furniture without instructions—confusing, occasionally frustrating, but ultimately rewarding. Our walks together allow us to explore our surroundings.

I’ve learned that even the smallest contributions can make a significant difference in balancing the parenting workload. It’s like they say: behind every great dad is a mom rolling her eyes and thinking, “Finally, he’s figuring it out!” And hey, if I can graduate from “clueless rookie” to “somewhat competent assistant parent,” that’s progress, right. Addressing these parenting double standards is essential for our family's happiness. Yes, I'm a work in progress, but I'm committed to fostering a supportive environment for everyone. Parenting is a team effort, and both partners deserve to feel valued.

As we navigate the ups and downs of parenting, I'd love to hear your thoughts or experiences. How do you handle double standards in your family? What strategies have worked for you in creating a more balanced parenting dynamic?

Until next time, enjoy the summer and cherish those little moments!

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Woof Woof! 🐾

Bonjour, les amis! Boujee and Dapper here, your favorite French bulldogs with a flair for the dramatic and a nose for adventure. This week, what a week! Our humans disappeared with our little Alyce for over 24 hours! Can you believe it? We thought they might have gone on a grand adventure without us, but luckily, our dads came quickly back to spend the night and bring us on walks because Kat and Alyce were gone.

Boujee, the nurse, knew something was up, and so did the loving Dr. Dapper! We spent the night before Alyce’s surgery right at her bedside, making sure she felt our love and encouragement for the next day. She is a warrior, but as a team, we always make sure we take care of the smallest one. We cuddled close, and every little snore was a reminder that we were right there, supporting her with all our doggy might.

When Kat and Alyce finally came back home from the hospital, we felt an enormous wave of relief! We were scared they would keep Alyce for longer. It’s so good having them all back to the pack! The house feels complete, the way a good French cheese board is never quite right without a slice of brie.

Dapper and I love when we are all together at home. There’s something magical about those moments when the whole family is under one roof, and the sounds of laughter and paws padding on the floor fill the air. Now, we can’t wait for Alyce to start crawling so that we can guide her steps around the house. We’ve got big plans to teach her the art of sneaking treats and finding the sunniest spots for afternoon naps.

So, until next time, keep your tails wagging and your noses sniffing. Adventure is always just around the corner, especially when you’re a French bulldog with a zest for life.

Au revoir, les amis!

Boujee & Dapper ❤️

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Thank you to our dear Vilhelmians for following our adventures! Hit like and subscribe for more! Get ready for a wild ride! Hit that subscribe button to join our awesome Substack community! Vilheeeeeelm!